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Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Proper Protocols of Acceptable Behavior for the FMLA Kickoff Event

Note from Tony: This article was very popular, because it turned out to describe the FetishMen philosophy better than earlier attempts.  Here is how the event mentioned below turned out.  Clearly, the message got through!



I have been receiving a surprisingly large number of requests for clarification concerning the upcoming FetishMenLosAngeles Kickoff Event on Saturday, April 27th from 5-8PM, at Antebellum Gallery at 1643 N. Las Palmas Ave in Hollywood.


It is clear that people want to understand what makes the "FetishMen/Desert Fetish Authority" events so different, and how they can best fit in.  So, here are every one of the required expectations of non-optional, STRICT protocol and demeanor :->




• Start with a hug. Every time.

• Greet strangers as if they were already your well-loved friend, even if you aren't particularly sexually attracted to them.

• Be authentic.

• Be fully self-expressed.

• Be kind.

• Help out if something seems to need it.  Don't wait to be asked. Everybody contributes at every event, from moment to moment, according to their talents and desires. Your reward is that you will feel as though you helped to make the event a success… Because you WILL have. That success is yours to enjoy and gladly share.



Our brother James in Afghanistan, participating live 
via Internet at our Men's Discussions every week.



Now, imagine everybody doing exactly those things, every time, at every event.  Nothing ever goes wrong, because everybody is getting their goodies. Why would somebody want to mess up such a good thing?


In San Diego, there have been over 500 events (!) that have been supported by FMSD, and NOTHING EVER GOES WRONG. The social vibe is exactly the same as warm puppies in a pile, or a bunch of naked three-year-olds playing together in a mud-puddle.


You can be as nice as you want to be, and it always turns out great.  Ahhhhhh. So sweet.


We know how to ATTRACT other men, but the hard part is always KEEPING them around. Nice, well-socialized grownups need a series of Guaranteed Safe Spaces, well-stocked with hugging, affectionate sweeties. Modern industrial society is aimed at keep men apart, suspect, discarded. WE are consciously and rebelliously celebrating the Good Man.


Think of us as the gay FetishMen's version of the Elks, or the Kiwanis Club.  We give older men a chance to be the loving, approving and supportive uncles that we were born to be, and the younger men a chance to be true leaders that receive every bit of support that they need to succeed.


We don't need more Tom of Finland stereotypes.  Got plenty of those.  We need more men who are:

- Respected because they are Respectable

- Loved because they are Lovable

- Honored because they are Honorable. and

- Admired because they are Admirable.




Want to know more? Listen to Papa Tony's two-hour audio talk on "How to Create Real Community in the Internet Age". Part Two will be recorded in Palm Springs on Saturday, April 20, 2013, and will be posted to the same link.

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