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Monday, October 25, 2010

Meatball Turkey Day Fundraising Dinner for Mama's Kitchen

Meatball Turkey Day Fundraising Dinner for Mama's Kitchen

5:00PM Friday, November 19th

 San Diego, CA 92103-3410 
(619) 692-2077

All you can eat spaghetti & turkey dinner, with drink specials. Raffle ticket included with entry fee.

Performances By: GlitzGlam, Daisy Deadpetals, Disco Dollie, Daisy Torres, Miss Conception, Ladonna Monroe. DJ GOD. All this for only $10.00.

Review and Pictures from Last Night's Leather Fashion Show

Here is my favorite memory from yesterday's Leather Fashion Show Benefit at the Center:

Kurt Wendelborg (standing in the center of this photo) came up to me, clearly delirious with the endorphins of joy.  He was magnificently happy because he had very successfully hosted his very first event, which had come into his hands suddenly, a few weeks before. He had inspired an incredibly dedicated team, and many people stepped forward to donate time and energy for the benefit of Being Alive

Best of all, there was a great big turn-out of highly motivated kinky folks (many of them in their very best fetish gear) to show support. Several of the volunteers were overcome with happiness, telling me "Next year's event is going to be EVEN BIGGER!" With that quality of support, I have no doubt of it.

I don't know if you have ever heard Shann Carr entertain a crowd, but she is justly famous in the gay community for her wit and charming stories that kept us all laughing. She also entertained us with snappy patter while we admired the traditional fetishwear donated by the Crypt, and well-crafted, exotic and new designs by Sasha Lippman.  

Kurt W. was one of the models, and was encouraged by the crowd to ham it up a bit. By the time the entire array of models came out for a final runway strut, the crowd was thoroughly ready to hit the Silent Auction for the final time. Being Alive made a good haul, the folks running the event created a success, the crowd of leatherfolk got to enjoy a superb social event, and everybody went home happy.

Any more reviews out there?  Please reply to this message. and I'll compile them for the online archives.

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Sunday, October 24, 2010


Puppy Play 101 at the San Diego Eagle, 10PM, Wednesday, November 3rd, 2010.

Come hang with San Diego puppy Patrol and California Leather Sir Miles B. Make new friends and find out what it's all about.

Demo by San Diego puppy Patrol pups. California Leather Sir Miles will host a Q&A session.

This is a call out for all San Diego pups and subs to come out and meet others.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Rocky Horror Show at OnStage in Chula Vista

(Anybody want to go together as a crowd?)

From: LthrAss <lthrass AT>

Hey, men.
OnStage Playhouse in Chula Vista is presenting Richard O'Brien's The Rocky Horror Show (the original play, not the movie), opening this Friday, October 29 and running weekends through November 27.  I'm playing Frank in this classic show about giving yourself over to absolute pleasure (so yes, this is a plug.)  We will have a couple special Saturday midnight showings for those that want to have a rowdy, shout-back crowd:  October 30 and November 20.

And yes, the whip is real and I know how to use it:

Group rates are available if you want to get your buddies together (10 or more).
 More info at:

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Membership Drive; Please forward this message

A while ago, I promised that I would send out a message that is designed to be forwarded to all of your friends who want a thriving community of gay males of leather, uniform, rubber, and fetishwear in San Diego.

Now that we have had three and a half months of successful events, it's time to tell your friends, so please pass this along widely:

- - - - 

FetishMenSanDiego (FMSD) is a non-commercial, new-style affinity-group with no dues, by-laws, elections or planning committees. Basically, folks join up, and get the news about upcoming events through email, calendar, Facebook, Twitter or several other online methods. See the bottom of this message for links.

Then, everybody shows up and has a great time.  That's it!

The PURPOSE of the group is to promote brotherhood, friendship and Tribe, rather than isolation and social deprivation caused by being stuck in front of our computers every day. It's a way to bring back what our community used to have, before so much fell apart when so many of us died.

It's working. Really, really well.

Read this article, and imagine yourself in the middle of it all. 196 guys showed up, and they were all delighted. No "A-List" having fun, while everybody else sort of infests the place in lonely isolation. No cliques having a snappy time, while shy newbies bounce off of the insiders' indifference.

Anybody who has attended our events in person can tell you the same thing - The level of friendliness, joy and comfortability is way beyond what has been available for years in San Diego. Our numbers are growing every single day, because we keep our promises, week after week, and month after month.

If you follow us online, you'll learn about:

- Upcoming FMSD social events, BEFORE they happen, rather than hearing about them afterward from your friends.

- Other events that would be of interest to our crowd, such as Palm Springs Leather Pride in November.

- Local businesses that gladly welcome fetishmen and cater to our needs. No financial connection exists between FMSD and ANY business, anywhere.

What you WON'T get is spam, ever. All lists are kept private.  Check the Message Archives below this, and see what has been sent out.  It's all there for your inspection.

We want every age, every body-style, every color, and every experience-level. The only group that we discriminate against is grumpy people!

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Sunday, October 17, 2010

Reviews of Our DRESS IT UP/STRIP IT DOWN Events

January 2011:

From: Papa Tony

Last night's Dress It Up/Strip It Down event at the Eagle was exactly what I was hoping that it would be - The bar was jammed, the men were friendly and hot, and lots of leather, fetish and flesh were everywhere. The roar of happy noise was continuous.

Now, THAT's my idea of a leather bar!

We got 46 new members for the group, among hundreds of men swarming in and out of the place all night. I never got a final count, but it was our biggest event so far, based on how jammed the bar became at its height, and how stressed the bartenders became as the crowd grew.

The door-guard spent a lot of time indoors, helping to clear away empty beverage containers, because the bartenders were super-busy and needed the help.

Josh and Jerry were making sure that everybody was at their ease, and several unannounced volunteers were doing their part to make newcomers feel welcome, too.  That says a lot about their excellent character.

I noticed something different, this time around.  The group has gone through several stages in the last few months, and has arrived at a new one:

- Getting back on our feet as a community... Done.
- Setting up "friendliness" as the new standard... Done.
- Exuberant extroverts getting sassy and frisky, and giving permission for everybody else to get frisky, too...  In process.

This most-recent phase is telling me that we've reached a new comfort-level as a community.  Of course, we have to keep it LEGAL, but I sure like to see so much fun erupting in a crowd of wonderfully hot men.

From: The FunCub

hey bud - just wanted to say thank you for the event last night at the Eagle. It was SO much fun, and I was definitely impressed with everything you said and how inviting everyone there was. Very very excited about future events. 

From: Bob

Possibly the best FMSD event yet.  Definitely was in terms of attendance -- the place was packed with a very friendly crowd.  Lots of new men, too, which was great. The only downside was that conversation was difficult with all the noise.  Not a bad problem, to have, though.

From: Josh

January's Dress it Up/Strip it Down event was very successful. A good time was had by all. Attitude was checked at the door and 99.8% of the crowd was friendly. I encountered only 2 uber doms who gave me that and 'why are U talking to me look...U meer mortal rebuff' and so they only enjoyed about 5 minutes of my chat time and I moved on to the rest who were there to chill out and have some fun so not too bad odds considering the turn out. I would comfortably estimate at about 200+ guys were there. Interesting observations were that a great many of those who showed up stayed for the whole evening, as body heat literally rose in the bar guy's shirts came off in mass, and there was an unusually high amounts of folks who spilled over to the sidewalks outside the bar whether it was to cool off or enjoy a smoke. The bartenders must have been on roller skates that night cause folks got served pretty damn quickly so no one went thirsty 4 sure. It was a proud moment for me personally because I have never Cohosted an event so to see so many guys enjoying themselves and having fun was amazing plus my personal friends also showed up for moral support. Now I feel very inspired to keep the ball rolling so that everytime folks can know that Dress it Up/Strip it Down equals a carefree, no attitude, wear my kink gear or strip it down enjoyable experience.

From: Dan

As a first time person stepping into the gay leather community I just wanted to say that both the Sir that I was test driving and I had a awesome time at the event. I felt not only welcome but desired... We both did.... It was a great feeling and a great evening. I look foreword to continuing my journey into this new world... 

Thanks again for making us feel so welcome. Even if we did threaten your hold on the "Cutest Couple" award!. Looking foreword to coming events... 

From: Lou

 hey Tony... I had a blast last night.  I did not know of the event going in, but glad I was there!  It was a great great time!  Lots of hot men!

From: Stephen K.

Thanks for a great get-together, Tony. I had a great time. Looking forward to the next one... ahhh, the smell of leather! 

From: Miles

Great job last night.  I personally spoke to several new faces and they all enjoyed the night.  Better each time ! 

From: Ray

Last night was the proof that you have put a lot of hard work into the vision and the guys were the pudding; eclectic, loving, sharing, supportive, and hot as hell.

October 2010:

From: Papa Tony

Last night's DRESS IT UP & STRIP IT DOWN event was our most successful gathering ever, on multiple levels. It was the biggest in terms of attendance, but it was also the most intense, in exactly the right way.

I was a little bit nervous, because the invitation I sent out was pretty unusual, and even kind of risky.  I was promising an awful lot.  I needn't have worried - the message of brotherhood is one that seem to be resonating with a lot of people. Anthony (who was on door-guard duty) told me that 196 people showed up. Here are just a few:

...and oh, my - everybody arrived PRIMED to get Tribal, right away. The energy-level remained solid at all times, even at 1:30am, when I finally left. The relaxed body-language of the crowd and the sheer volume of laughing, happy conversation were at optimum levels.

Normally, in a crowded, noisy bar, it's really hard to get the crowd's attention for public announcements and presentations. Usually, it's an escalating war between the chattering patrons and the folks trying to get their attention. Last night, several groups made announcements:

Tom Dickerson and Mike Russell "pinned" two of the newest members of Mama Reinhardt's Leather Family, and
Kurt Wendelborg invited everyone to attend this next Sunday's Leather Fashion Show Benefit for Being Alive at the Center.

When we asked for everybody's attention, the crowd went DEAD SILENT. The entire crowd was totally interested, involved and happy to hear what was being said. Everybody applauded at the right times, seemed to want to know more, and was unbelievably respectful. It was frickin' eerie - You normally never see that much courtesy and good manners from a bunch of drunken, rowdy and horny kinksters!

Snowy and Cobi were on duty, shining up boots with perfect results, as usual. I don't want to take these fine folks for granted, ever - They add so much to our events, by continuing a tradition that has been a part of our community since the very beginning.

Sir Nicholas (the owner of the Eagle) was there last night, and he seemed very happy indeed. Yes, our events are good for business, but he always tells me how wonderful it is to see the Eagle being exactly what it was always meant to be - a gathering-place for our kind of men. He probably digs the Tribal Vibe more than anybody else!

So - please reply to this message and bring me YOUR review of last night's event!

UPDATE: The reviews keep coming in:

From: Sir Tim

Here is my review of last night's event - I totally agree it was a success.
This was my first FMSD event. I was excited and anxious to finally attend. I am fairly shy in large groups where I don't know anyone (and this was one of those occasions). I did reach out and meet a handful of the guys at the event and they were all quite nice. Not one person was unwelcoming or unfriendly. I will be much more relaxed and comfortable at the next event.
I also had my boots done by Cobi. He did an awesome job, of course. And there's nothing like a hot guy working on your boots to cap off what was an otherwise fine evening in its own right. I too left about 1:30 am. I couldn't believe how quickly the time had passed!
Thank you for organizing these events. It was a pleasure to meet you. You are a true gentleman, and I salute you. Long live the Tribe!

From: Al

Al here... we met last night at the eagle.  Just wanted to let you know what a great time I had.  Your friendship and honesty were heartfelt.

I just read your profile.  I TOTALLY understand what you wrote.  I lost all my close friends years ago the same way you did.  It's been a hard road since then - on so many levels.

I look forward to being an active member of the group and very interested in volunteering in any way possible for any of the upcoming events.

From: Ray

It was inspiring to see all the hot fetish men chatting, hugging, mingling, kissing and enjoying themselves and each other. That is not a usual sight in a bar like the Eagle. Most of the time there are small groups of leather guys huddling in corners talking to same three friends all evening, leaving the guys that show up solo for an evening of friendship, by them selves, wishing that they had not come out for the evening.  Last night shattered the mold, broke the rules, and showed everyone that the tribe is alive and gathering new guys each and every time that we get together. It is obvious that the Social Retardation is on it's way out and the celebration of brotherhood is alive and growing.

From: Kevin

I had a great time last night and I gotta give you credit for convincing me to take my shirt off, I got a lot more attention than I anticipated!  Thanks! 

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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Leather Fashion Show Benefit in a Week and a Half

I'm definitely planning to attend this event myself - There are no conflicting events that I'm aware of, and it's an extremely worthy cause. I've known MANY men who have benefited from Being Alive's efforts over the years, and they continue to need our help in order to help others. 

Kurt (the gentleman who contacted me about helping him get the news out about this event) is a new brother among us in San Diego. He's the one on the left in this picture, and he is a very charismatic man who is going to make a huge difference in San Diego's community. I spent a few hours with him today, and we need many more good men like him who are willing to step forward and make a difference!

San Diego's HIV/AIDS Organization Holds Inaugural Fashion Show Fundraiser – October 24
San Diego, California – Being Alive San Diego will host its first fundraising event titled Being Alive in Leather.  The event will be held at 5PM, on Sunday, October 24 at The Center at 3909 Centre Street. Cost is $30 per person for VIP tickets and $20 per person for supporter tickets. All proceeds from the event benefit Being Alive services, which provides mutual support, access to information, public advocacy, and public interaction for people living with HIV/AIDS.
“Being Alive the only local community center that is fully-focused on support for people living with HIV/AIDS, and we feel the work we’re doing is critical in the community,” said Shannon Wagner, Executive Director of Being Alive. “I think this new event promises to be a very enjoyable evening and it comes just in time. In the past year, our funding has been drastically cut, so we hope it will generate some much-needed income. All of the proceeds from the evening will help Being Alive continue to provide services and support through the rest of 2010.”

Being Alive in Leather will feature a fashion show, hosted bar, silent auction, hors d'oeuvres and dessert. The fashion show includes a large selection of leather clothing, clubwear, fetish gear and underwear all modeled by community volunteers. Garments featured in the show are provided by The Crypt on Park Boulevard, plus original designs by local designer, Sasha Lippman. All items on the runway will be available for bid in the silent auction, which will also feature many products and services donated by community businesses.

The evening's emcee is comedienne Shann Carr, who has 26 years of exclusively gay standup experience at her hip, is listed as one of the top 10 stand-up entertainers by Curve magazine, has been featured on Logo, and is a past winner of International Ms. Leather. Attendees will also experience high-energy music by DJ Rob Klaproth, a top 24 finalist in's nation-wide DJ Talent search, creating a fun and energetic vibe.

Major Sponsors of Being Alive in Leather are: The Crypt, Redwing Bar & Grill, Priority Pharmacy, San Diego Leather pride and GSGRA - San Diego Chapter and Beyond Fierce designs. The hosted bar and volunteer bar staff are donated by the Golden State Gay Rodeo Association-Greater San Diego Chapter. The event location at The Center is underwritten by San Diego Leather Pride.
Being Alive San Diego is a non-profit organization whose mission is to deliver quality, compassionate services to people affected by HIV/AIDS; and to provide education and referral services to those in need. Being Alive is a volunteer organization enhancing the personal dignity and quality of life of people living with HIV/AIDS. For more information, please visit or call (619) 291-1400.                # # #

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Easy Intimacy, 9PM This Saturday

DRESS IT UP/STRIP IT DOWN with FetishMenSanDiego

Event details here, and here's a picture of some of the 155 men who came to our similar event in July.

9PM and onward, Saturday, October 16, 2010
3040 North Park Way, San Diego,  CA 92104-3626
(619) 295-8072

I like sex.  A lot.  In fact, I recommend it to all of my friends :->

If men come to FetishMen events and hook up there, I'm delighted. It's a great opportunity to use your charm, charisma and your best outfit (or your shirtless flesh) to snag some hot action… as opposed to being judged harshly from a distance, using nothing better than text and pictures on an online profile.

However, that's about five percent of my goal for all FMSD events. The other 95% has to do with what I call Easy Intimacy. Otherwise known as Tribe, as Community, or as Brotherhood. I used to experience it at every leathermen's event in the 1970's. Every FMSD event so far has contained increasing amounts. You guys are getting the hang of this, fast.

As male homosexuals, we're accustomed to using sex as a way to lure men closer, and as a handshake to say howdy. So, we learn how to drop the shields quickly, and get right down to it.  That ability to relax is also our strength as a brotherhood, if we know that it's possible, desirable and necessary. Some of the best times I've shared with other men haven't involved sex at all, but have been as comfy-sweet as puppies in a pile together.

We live in a world that discourages intimacy between men - "That's QUEER!" - "Ewww, they're holding hands!" In the old days, gay leathermen were imprisoned (or far worse) if we were caught being intimate.

In THIS century, we're becoming socially retarded due to Internet isolation. I hear it every day:

"I don't go out much any more".  As if the guy saying it, thinks he's the only one.

Well, welcome to the club, dude - we all vegetate in front of our computers, and we lose our social graces. But wouldn't it be nice if we would all just let go at the same time, show up together, and agree to be relaxed, happy, accepting and joyful, all together in a bunch, as gay fetishmen with a lot more in common than what sets us apart?

THAT is what is happening at FetishMenSanDiego events, more and more. If that's what you want for yourself, then please review Rule Number One for All FMSD Events, and be the kind of man who can smile with every tooth in your head showing at the same time, because you can't help it. Listen to the sound of happy laughter that is a feature of every FMSD event, and join right in.

Hug somebody - It's what we do.  It's getting easier, I promise. The focus is getting sharper, and the promise is coming true, more and more.

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Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Excellent Leatherwear Crafters, Back in Town

I just had a visit today with Mama Macarena and Leo:

Acropolis Space Center
3200 Highland Ave - Suite 407
National City, CA 91950

I've known them for many years, and I'm glad that they are back in town. If you know and love these wonderful people, you'll be glad to know that Leo is doing fine, and Mama is trimming down very sleekly! 

If you need something modified to fit you perfectly, Leo can do it in a flash, and perfectly. I watched him take a pair of baggy, heavy-material jeans and make them fit perfectly to fit inside tall boots and flatteringly along the full length, with no visible sign of modification, and it happened before I realized. Right after that, he modified a pair of chaps to un-do the crappy job that somebody else had done to them.

I have bought many items that they have crafted, and those items are my most-prized kinky possessions.  They are built for a lifetime of enjoyment.  It's simply not possible for Leo to do less than 100% on any job - He's driven to excellence. When he creates chaps, or a jacket, or any other fetish item from nothing except your ideas and scraps of leather, it's as if the same company that does leather upholstery for Porsche had done the job.  

If you've ever seen men wearing leather kilts in town, it's pretty darned likely that Leo created them. My "Masterpiece Kilt" is one of five made, and I wore it to Folsom Street Fair this last month. A VERY tall Scotsman came up to me and my boy Jerry (who had recently bought the last one) and complimented us on our kilts, saying that he despised the usual fetish kilts he saw in this country, but our Masterpiece Kilts were the first ones he had ever seen that he actually wanted for himself.

If you've seen really, REALLY stylish San Diego fetishmen wearing custom-made gear, I guarantee that they got it from MacLeo. If you see a titleholder vest that is impeccably crafted, MacLeo is the source. We are extremely blessed to have them back in town. No matter how small a job, they can do it perfectly, and no matter how extravagant your budget may be, they can fulfill your goals as well as ANYONE on earth.  

If your goal is to look your very best when you are strutting your stuff, these are the first people to call.

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Monday, October 4, 2010

Upcoming Events for Gay FetishMen

(Note from Papa Tony - Please forward this to your buddies who don't know that San Diego's gay-male leather/rubber/uniform/fetish community is doing great, with fun events every month to promote brotherhood. Spread the word as far as you can, preferably with a personal note to let 'em know that this is the real deal, not some sort of scam.  Thanks!)

All events listed below are purely social. They are also ultra-beyond-friendly, particularly for newbies to the group:

- Puppy Night is at the Eagle at 9PM on Wednesday, October 7, hosted by San Diego Puppy Patrol.

Cigars, Boots & Beer, 5pm @ Redwing on the first Sunday of every month.

- The next Dress Code Night is coming again to the Eagle, on Saturday, Oct. 16 at 9PM, with the newer, looser dress code: if you're not going to dress up fancy, you have to strip down and make the rest of us happy!

- Starting on Sunday, Nov. 28, FETISHMEN TEA DANCE will be at the Flame on the fourth Sunday of every month from 4PM to 8PM. The first one is going to be huge, and folks will be talking about its unique and very, very powerful theme for years to come. You will be mad at yourself if you miss it. Seriously.

- The MENTORING workshop hosted by SDLOG will be at 7PM on Friday, November 5.

Palm Springs Leather Pride is always on the second weekend in November. There is a group of San Diego men who will be attending together, sharing travel and lodging.

- I'm starting to solidify plans for a Rubber event

- I'm waiting for the weather to be consistently cooler so that we can schedule a Fetishmen Dinner out on the patio at DiMille's. It'll be inexpensive, high-quality and fun!

For lots more detailed information, join up with us online, using the links below. There are currently eight ways to follow us online.

The email list is growing rapidly, but it needs to be much, much bigger. The last time I created a list like this one, we had a little over 3,000 men on the list (the "PT-List"… Some of you might remember it from a decade ago). 

The numbers matter. A lot.

Our community has been fractured. We don't read the gay rags any more, and we don't congregate at the same places any more, so nobody knows about events before they happen. If you want to see bigger crowds of like-minded, sociable and satisfied men, then, please reach out to your friends and invite them to join the FetishMenSanDiego email list, or follow us in many other ways.

Just ask, and I'll add folks myself. Or, use the links below. Our message archives are online for your inspection, so that you can see that this is for real.

In return, you have my promise that you (and they) will never get any spam as a result… Not from me, and not from anybody else (it will always be a private list). You'll only receive useful information that you'll be glad to see. If you're not happy, then just unsubscribe with one click, and no hard feelings.

I've been part of the kink & fetish Tribe since 1977. I'm a rare creature, because I remember how things used to be, when our community was at its best and on the rise. All FMSD events are designed to bring back that vibe, over and over, as a series of safe, welcoming spaces where  men can have a thoroughly satisfying time, and go home feeling good about what happened. Years after my Rampart dance parties at Shooterz, I still get stopped in the parking lot, or at the bank, by men who rave about the joyful times they experienced at Rampart. I miss those days as much as they do, so FMSD is the new way to accomplish that.

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Sunday, October 3, 2010

So... What's the long-term plan?

(I'm typing this with one thumb on my iPhone - my main Internet connection on the telephone pole got fried when a lightning-bolt blasted the palm tree across the street. Hopefully all will be fixed today)

FetishMenSanDiego has been in existence for a little over three months now, with many wonderful events accomplished, and a whole bunch planned for 2011 and beyond. I figure it's time to take stock, step back a bit, and focus on the long-term goals:

- FMSD's biggest asset is our credibility, and the credit for that belongs to the men who have stepped up to make a difference. For instance: FMSD wouldn't exist in the first place if it weren't for BootsSD Jeff, who got the ball rolling. Every event has featured local heroes who have stepped up to the plate, given their word, and KEPT their word. By living in integrity, these superb men have provided a series of safe spaces where anyone who arrives can feel welcomed. There are waaaay too many solid, dependable men to mention here, but you know who you are, and the benefit of your efforts is all around us at every event.

- Every event so far has been an experiment. There is always an element of risk, and that is just dandy. It's 2010, and we need to find out what works NOW. My personal goal is to create satisfying, long-term, dependable events that become locked-in traditions because they WORK really well... Annual events that attract out-of-towners who want to jam the halls and rooms of a host-hotel or two. Monthly events that fetishmen wouldn't miss for any reason. Special events that delight us with pleasant surprises and celebrate what makes us unique.

- I'm not that important. Yes, creating and publicizing events is about as hard as breathing for me. Big deal.  The real, valuable and primary value inherent in our events comes from the good-hearted men who show up and take ownership of every event. THESE ARE NOT PAPA TONY'S PARTIES. They are everyone's, and nothing makes me happier. When there's a solid clump of ecstatically happy men at every event, it's not being caused by anything that I'm personally doing - Everyone is grabbing the brotherhood theme and going for it with happy hearts. Maybe I started the ball rolling, but everybody else has been snatching it up and running with it.  Cool.

- In March, I will have had thirty-two years' experience in creating events (many of which have involved car clubs). Many have vanished with time, but many have become traditions, and are still cranking away, decades after I've moved on. In order to have plenty of dependable, rock-solid traditional events for our fetishmen community, it's crucial that we get the word out.  I will be announcing a Membership Drive shortly. I will be cranking out an email that will be SIZZLING with irresistible invitations that will be intoxicatingly attractive to any fetishman who wants better days for all of us as a Tribe. Once I've done that, it will land with a thud unless you (yes, you, personally) take it up and spread the word. I CAN'T FIND PEOPLE effectively, all by myself. Nobody can. In the age of Manhunt, Bear411, Adam4Adam and so forth, we have become scattered and divided. There is no central source of information any more - we don't congregate at the bars any more, and we don't read the gay rags. So, the only way that FMSD can become a huge, internationally-respected icon of brotherhood is if we tell our brothers about it. I went to Folsom Street Fair, and talked a whole bunch (imagine that) with a bunch of strangers, every day. The majority of new faces I met were from San Diego, and none of them had any idea that our city's fetishmen community had woken up again, and been building momentum for the last three months. The only one who can fix that is YOU. So, please help me get the word out. If you've enjoyed the real, solid pleasures at our events, and want them to get better by several orders of magnitude, please forward my upcoming message, once it arrives, to as many fetishmen as you can find. Joy doesn't go thermonuclear if it's reserved for a few insiders - MASSIVE joy happens when we 100% of us are all together, as brothers. By passing along something that is real, honest and joyful, you're investing in much better days for all of us, and future generations.

Thanks in advance for your help. FMSD is growing at a steady rate. I'm greedy and impatient - I want a completely unreasonable explosion of brotherhood and joy... Otherwise known as Tribe. I'm willing to do what it takes for all of us to get there.

I'll see you all at 5PM this afternoon at Redwing. It's going to be a mob!


On November 28th, 2010, at 4PM at the Flame, FetishMenSanDiego will host our first ongoing, monthly dance-party that will be held on the fourth Sunday of each month.

It will be called FETISHMEN TEA DANCE. That's not the big news.

This is:

The theme of our kick-off event is "IN LOVING MEMORY". Let me explain:

In order for gay fetishmen to move powerfully into the future, we have to acknowledge our past. Gay leathermen were the first to start dying of AIDS, and we were hit the hardest.

This fact has robbed us of many of our best leaders, mentors and role-models. It broke our momentum as a thriving community, and crushed the souls of too many survivors.

It's time to deal with it, and powerfully. Together. NOW.

We do it by dancing joyfully. Many of our brothers can't dance any more, and they won't be coming back, no matter how much we want them to. So, we dance for them.

Bring your friends, and carry the spirits of your brothers in your heart. Go wild. Every song will be a celebration of life... High spirits, wide variety, Diva Overload.

We want every age, every color, every body-style, every experience-level. There will be men and women of all kinds at the November event - We all need to express powerful feelings of loss and remembrance through dance, and we all benefit by sharing.

We will be unified as a community by honoring our loved ones. Be like a happy three-year-old: dance with no cares or concerns.

Please spread the word, by forwarding this email far and wide - Let's jam the place. Let's make this MEAN SOMETHING, once and for all. I could use some healing, and I'm not the only one.

This event is free of charge. There will be a request for a $5 donation to Mama's Kitchen, but no one will be turned away for lack of funds.

Come and be welcome.

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